Tom Parker’s widow, Kelsey, has opened up about life following her husband’s death, and how she’s fighting the loneliness for her kids.
Speaking on Tuesday morning’s Lorraine, Kelsey Parker, 32, shared an insight into her life with Tom, as well as what it’s like raising their two children while trying to cope with the loss of their dad.
In the heartbreaking interview, Kelsey admits that she is “lonely”, but the kids help her get through the day, as well as trying to live life like her husband did.
She told Lorraine: “[The kids] wake up happy and in a good mood, so I can’t be sad, and he wouldn’t want us to be sad and mourning. Don’t get me wrong, I get my bad days, of course I do.
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“At night it is lonely, I am lonely, but this is my life and I have to get on with it.”
Kelsey says that their daughter, Sophie, 2, is still struggling to comprehend that her dad is no longer with them, and keeps thinking he might be coming back.
She said: “Whenever she sees her dad she’s like ‘it’s my dad!’, she will be three at the end of this month.
“I’ve been really honest [with her], but she still talks about him every day and still doesn’t quite understand he’s not coming back. I’m having to be really blunt to say ‘he’s not coming back, that’s it, he’s dead’, and she doesn’t really understand.
“The book’s out, she’s seen him in the store, she’s been like ‘well he’s been on tour, is he going to come back from this?’, so she’s really confused by it.
“Then we do talk about him every day, she does ask about him every day. We have little things around the house that were Tom’s, so she’ll see his wallet and say ‘that’s daddy’s wallet’ and I say ‘yes, that’s daddy’s wallet’.”
But when Tom was still with them after the diagnosis, he refused to let them be sad. Kelsey said: “He lived life really quick, that’s what his mum says, everything he did he did really quickly. I’ve got two of them at home that are exactly the same.
“That’s how we lived our life, with hope, positivity, that’s how we actually got through each day. He did get a really bad diagnosis, stage four terminal cancer, and it’s like, how do you live life with that, and honestly our house was never sad, it was a happy place to be in, and that’s why we wanted to write a book and share that with people.
“Our house has had a laughter in it for the last 18 months, two years since the diagnosis, we were genuinely happy, we were always laughing and having a good time. I was so lucky to have him as a husband.”
The pair met when she was 19 years old, immediately falling in love, and Kelsey said they didn’t hesitate in making the most of their time together.
She said: “It was love at first sight at 19, you never think at 19 you’re going to meet your soulmate, but we did and we’d been through so much together. Our lives, we did so much together, we crammed so much time into that short space that we had together.
“The holidays we’ve been on, the wedding, it’s like, everything was really fast.
“He was my actual best friend, I loved him so much. The love I had for him is like no other. It’s the little things like I don’t get to text him when things happen, I don’t get to call him , I really miss him.”
Kelsey has had to do a lot of things alone for the first time in over ten years since Tom’s death, including attending a wedding by herself last month, which she admits was “really hard” to deal with.
She said: “[The wedding was] the first thing I found really hard, weddings are emotional anyway, I’m sitting there and they’re doing their vows, and I’ve lost the love of my life.”
But Kelsey has had a lot of support from friends, family, fellow celebrities, and even the general public – with an outpouring of love for him as he received treatment and after his death, which “overwhelmed” Kelsey.
She said: “The support was really overwhelming. There was my love for him, I loved him so much, but it was so lovely that everybody else loved him, everyone has a story about him.
“The kids are really lucky that when they get older people will say ‘when we met your dad…’, they’ve got that for their dad. It was so overwhelming, the love, I couldn’t even read all of the message I’ve got.”
Kelsey has decided to keep a box of Tom’s things and memories for the kids to have when they’re older, including a book for each of them from their dad.
She said: “I’ve kept so much for them, they’ve got boxes. They’ve got a book in each, Aurelia keeps trying to get her hands on it and I keep saying ‘its in your box now’.”
She also spoke briefly about Ed Sheeran and how he helped Tom pay for his medical bills, allowing Tom to get more treatment and spend more time with his family
Kelsey said: “What he did for us, for our family, to give me more time with Tom, he is an unbelievable person, he didn’t need to do that, and he wasn’t even asking for anything for it.”
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